The Mystery of the Missing Birthday Package

Dear USPS,

I sent a birthday package to my one and only sister two weeks ago only for her to tell me it had just arrived today. It was cleanly slit open with all its contents missing, simply labeled, "damaged in handling". I dropped off the package personally during off-hours at the USPS in Amherst, NY (Located at 5500 North Bailey Ave.). I bought adequate postage using the APC at the entrance before entrusting it in your hands through the big mail bin. Alas, I did not purchase the insurance or tracking services which you kindly (and unfortunately, necessarily) provide.

This package contained a blouse (worth $49.00), chopsticks sets (~ $4.00) a tea infuser thingamajig (~$5.00) a birthday card (~$2.00) and lots of love (priceless). I do understand that things get damaged during handling, but this looks like thievery to me. I hope you do the right thing.

A disappointed patron,
Melissa Lee.

Bad Timing

Bad timing is when you're sneaking out for a game of tennis in the evening and the elevator doors open at the entrace with your boss on the other side of the doors.